Strange day today it was. Didn't really get up and moving until like 3... went to Chinese new year dinner. Went to tap... went to hang out with Vic... took her back to tap... went to the bar.... had a b33r... came back home.

So what is so strange about that? Well I woke up at 3 PM to chat online until the last minute, which i didn't really get ready until 5 I think... and dinner was at 6. My ex was invited and failed to mention that she was going to be showing up to the dinner. Tap was the usual shit... hyphy kids everywhere so I wanted to get out as soon as I could. Drove to the city to pick up Vic and hang out with her for awhile. Dropped her back off in the city (not getting lost either time... strange in deed. Went to the bar and had a b33r by myself haha I'm a looser. Strangely though I didn't get drunk off the one beer and drove home less than an hour later, some how still sober. It never kicked in either... to my knowledge at least. I got home about 2 or 3.... and I haven't been able to sleep at all. What the fuck is my malfuntion? Ha ha... I unno... I'm tired but not at the same time. It's 7:30 and I still can't sleep.... fawwwwwk!

Oh well... tis all! sleep I go! Well... try to at least lol

[Edit]

Went through xanga and started to delete old posts. Wooow it is like some wierd fucked up time line. Have gone through what... three vehicles, didn't even bother counting girlfriends... and the only thing that stays consistent is me being single, me complaining about being single, something with a girl, and being n3kkid. Haha ill finish deleting the rest when I wake up... and the computer stops dying!

V day!

Sooooo... how did my V day go? Ehhhh started out pretty shitty-ish but it all worked outself out.

Watched Elijah, got some Hawaiian BBQ, and just chilled back and watched TV until he passed out. Then he got hella hyphy when his mom came back, so funny and cute though! He would just look at me, look at the TV and then go back to sleep lol. Got a wonderful card from Rhia and a buncha scratchers (which I think I only won a free ticket... my luck is horrible). Haha no girl problems, no big planning, nothing! The most chill V day EVAR! Next year I hope I have a date though for the night.... well i hope I have a girlfriend lol.

Well since my neck is all fucked up and I'm not really doing anything, its time to write write write.

I think i've been too close to getting myself killed too many times to think of the accident as a life changing experience. I'm just glad that no one was in the car with me. The car is FUBAR though, but i guess it was meant to be right?

Still trying to figure out why I'm still here after everything that has ever happened. God or whoever is high up there has had plenty of excuses to off me or something but still finds use for me. Haha I don't think i'll ever figure out my purpose in life, but I guess there's still a reason and something to leave me behind here for. Ehh maybe I won't go out in a ball of flames or something wierd like I thought I would. I have plenty of other medical issues working against me all the time lol.

Sooo... what else is new? Back in the bay area for college and work, I plan to stay here for good (haha said that so many times). I figure maybe this time I'll be able to stay in at least one "area" for more than 4 years... buut that has never really worked out so we'll see. At least I have been relativly keeping myself out of trouble and stuff.

So what else is there to talk about... ahhh relationships. Probably one of the most important things that went throughout my life. Let's see, i've been single for maybe... 2 or 3 months? Ooooh yeah you heard it, I've actually been single for over a month. Strange but true. I unno I've been having too many bad experiences lately with dating one girl or another, been being picky too. So I aint tripping, I'll spend V Day by myself and stuff. That or I'll find someone who deserves to be taken out and stuff and show her a good time.  I unno, any kind of "relationship" i'm in im just hella confused and don't know what to do about it.

What I want is simple, something that's going to last. No matter what anyone else thinks, it's true. Will I be able to have that? Who knows anyone will say that it's highly unlikely with me, but I think I can do it. Who wants it or deserves it? I sure don't know but aint no one been taking me up the offer lol. Been single for days and... there have been girls here and there, but they are all complicated ass situations. I'm giving them time to resolve them but... i unno if someone isn't interested i'm sure not going to force them. Haha what's the point of that? No matter how much time goes by, I'm still the same Steven with the same morals and rules. Only thing that changes is looks, age, and experience. I still have all my old experience, just some new ones here and there.

So when that girl finds me that really wants to be happy and treated wonderfully, she'll find me. I just hate this waiting game... waiting for her to find me, for her to want me, and whatever else. Then again, I guess I've always been way to impatient lol.

Maybe I'll update this more often, but so far it's just been the same shit, different day. Things here and there but a lot I can't and would rather not talk about. One day though, but for now I'm outtie.